As humans we make mistakes, that’s part of life but how much do we accept that? When are high standards too high? Do you have high standards? Do you find yourself constantly striving for better? Has anyone ever suggested that you are a perfectionist? But, that’s a good thing isn’t it? Isn’t it good to have a goal and push for it? Isn’t this what gets you excellent results? I’m not so sure…
We all put ourselves under incredible pressure at points in our lives. Whether it’s setting up your own business, going for promotion at work, or organising a family event. We all strive to get things right – perfect in fact.
During these times we can lose a sense of perspective and forget that it’s the taking part and the journey that matters, not a perfect end result. During these times it’s wise to take a step back and see what really matters. For some these high standards get in the way of happiness, sometimes they can actually push us to the point where our performance is impaired. We can become so angry and self critical because of one mistake or slip up. Sound familiar?
There is a big difference between the healthy pursuit of excellence and the unhelpful striving for constant perfection. Sometimes we can become so consumed by the pursuit of the unobtainable that it impacts upon our lives in many ways, we can’t reflect and take a step back, it becomes all consuming. Constantly striving for these unrelenting standards can result in: feeling tense, on edge or stressed out. Often our best efforts aren’t good enough so that the excessive drive to excel is self defeating as it leaves little chance to reach our goals and little chance to feel good about ourselves.
Judging ourselves based on our ability to achieve, is like putting all of our eggs in one basket. This makes us particularly vulnerable, as not reaching our goals results in us feeling like a failure. As humans beings we make mistakes, that’s a normal, healthy part of life but being the ultimate perfectionist leaves no room for this.
Pursuing perfection can leave little time for anything else, it can have a huge impact on our well being. It can lead to social isolation, depression, stress, worry, frustration, relationship difficulties, repeated checking of work, insomnia, poor health and much more.
Find out more about Capital CBT here www.capitalcbt.com
